from the left-left-left-right-left department.
written by alan on April 23, 2006
Moving forward isn't always an easy thing to do in this life. However, it's what must be done. I am learning how to move forward. This experience is teaching me that lesson, and it's teaching me very well. No matter what may happen in life, we must move forward.
I have a problem with always thinking the worst of things. Pessimism, I believe it's called. My particular brand of pessimism makes my emotions do things that I would otherwise not want. I've had it. I'm done with what this does to me. It makes every situation that much harder. So, I'm taking steps to deal with this pessimism. The steps are small at first, but they are going further and further as I learn. Right now, I find that simply talking to myself, out loud, enables me to work through issues like this. I've talked to myself for as long as I can remember. It's always how I've worked tough things out. I rationalize events and decisions, pour through potential outcomes, and reach conclusions about how best to proceed. Just today, my emotions started to go rampant with the worst possible events and outcomes possible. But, I took the time to lay it all out and think about it. I rationalized what I was thinking. I dismissed what had no basis and kept going with what I knew was true. I refocused myself and I find that I am happier. I overcame it this time! Now I know how I can do it the next time. :)
So, this coming Saturday is the day. The day I find out what's going on. I want it to be a good day. That is my goal. I am going to focus on making that happen to the best of my ability.
I'll let you all know how it turns out. :)
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